Imperfect Scenarios Podcast
Life is messy, unpredictable, and often hilarious and we’re here to break it all down. From hot topics to the dumbest things people do, we’re serving up raw, unfiltered conversations with a mix of humor, insight, and a touch of chaos. Whether it’s pop culture, everyday absurdities, or the conversations you didn’t know you needed, we tackle it all with a no-holds-barred approach.
Trying to make perfect sense of imperfect scenarios!
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Imperfect Scenarios Podcast
Exploring Sexual Preferences: Humor, Double Standards, and One-Night Stand Tales
*LOST EPISODE from season 1 Date: January 26, 2020*
Ever wondered if your porn preferences say something profound about your personality? We kick off with some hilarious banter about relationships, the ethics of leaving behind a "token," and the age-old amateur versus staged porn debate. From personal tales and preferences that lean toward authenticity and relatability, to humorous exchanges on the nuances of amateur lesbian porn and the rabbit holes of search habits, we explore the lighter side of adult entertainment with plenty of laughs along the way.
Switching gears, we dive into the murky waters of sexual double standards, especially for straight men curious about same-sex encounters. Through candid personal stories, including one about a "slow walk" into new experiences, we explore societal perceptions and emotional dynamics that affect self-identity and experimentation. It's a thought-provoking journey through curiosity, emotions, and social pressures that often go unspoken, shaping both relationships and the individuals within them.
Finally, get ready for a vibrant discussion on the role of erotic literature and personal preferences in setting the mood. We talk about everything from the allure of erotic books to 90s R&B as the soundtrack to intimacy, all while debating if silence or sound enhances the experience. To top it off, we share wild stories of one-night stands, including an unexpected beach crab encounter in Jamaica, and reflect on the amusing dance of maintaining privacy with creative pseudonyms. This episode promises a blend of laughter, insight, and moments that everyone can relate to.
You are listening to Imperfect Scenarios, judgment zone. You know how many dudes I've hooked up with who are in relationships and in their bed and stuff.
Speaker 3:Did you like make it all messy?
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 3:I wasn't petty like that.
Speaker 1:Did what I had to do and leave.
Speaker 3:I would be like.
Speaker 2:Let me leave you a token of my love. That's what. You guys are the worst.
Speaker 5:You guys are absolutely the worst.
Speaker 1:All right well.
Speaker 5:Let's get into the porn.
Speaker 3:We just were no more liquor for y'all.
Speaker 4:Oh my God, let's get into the porn. We just were.
Speaker 3:I think I'm no more looking for y'all.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, it's terrible. Okay, who here watches porn?
Speaker 5:I think we all do, don't we? I don't know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I do Twice a day, not regularly.
Speaker 5:Morning and evening, but you know it's different because with women we tend to look at all the details in porn.
Speaker 1:Like what.
Speaker 5:So we'll look at her face and we'll be like, oh, you know, she faking it right. Or we'll look at the intense orgasm and be like, yeah, right, but for you guys it's more about the sex.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah.
Speaker 5:It's just about getting a nut, busting it off, yep.
Speaker 4:And that's it, and that's it. I definitely pay attention. I don't like the stage stuff. I don't really watch porn like that.
Speaker 1:I don't like the stage stuff either.
Speaker 4:The things that look fake.
Speaker 1:The amateur porn.
Speaker 5:I'm with that shit, because it's real.
Speaker 1:The shit is real. The amateur is my best. I love amateur porn.
Speaker 3:That's because you probably want to make the shit.
Speaker 1:It. Amateur is my best. I love amateur porn. That's because you probably want to make the shit. It's nothing like having a person that seems real.
Speaker 2:The stage stuff you put on a show.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that fake-ass moaning and all that stupid shit, the acting Skip all that shit. Let's get to the nitty-gritty so I can get this shit done. Get on with my business.
Speaker 3:He's like I need you to be real so I can be real Exactly Now. I told you guys.
Speaker 1:this, because I can fantasize better. If you're real, I can fantasize better.
Speaker 4:So I told you guys this before we did have a conversation about porn. Before and after our conversation I did check out the amateur porn section of porn hub and I did find that I could visualize myself in some of this stuff these people were doing like like couples wise, and I'm like, okay, I could get down with this. So I I have to agree, I guess amateur porn is okay, and so was lesbian porn oh yeah, I think guys like lesbian porn. I think it's more sensual because it's just it's more sensual.
Speaker 4:Yeah not the ones I watch but however, amateur lesbian porn is a no amateur lesbian I never looked that up. Okay, because you're gonna get two butches. Oh gosh, you're gonna get.
Speaker 1:It's not interesting really don't even do it. You know, know, I'm trying, you know I'm trying.
Speaker 3:I looked after you guys played me out because I didn't watch it. So I looked and I liked the lesbian one, the amateur lesbian.
Speaker 4:Yeah, did you catch the two?
Speaker 3:butch ladies. Scroll through the videos to maybe like see the keyword is amateur, though, what you got to put it amateur you just put in lesbian porn.
Speaker 1:You're just gonna get a bunch of lesbian porn, but she's talking about amateur.
Speaker 3:You can tell the difference what she's saying if you.
Speaker 1:What she's saying is, if you have amateur but you can tell you should get butchers if you put no, because there's some.
Speaker 3:I look at ones that I look at ones who are like kind of good looking right, like I don't want to see two ugly people like, but you're missing the keywords. Amateur, but you can tell the difference between ones that are stage and ones that are amateur can you really?
Speaker 4:sometimes you can't but sometimes even like the one couple that I found, they were amateur, but they were stage, they were doing what they were doing, but regardless of that, like it's, it's a married couple and and I could, I was like, damn, if I get married, I want some shit like that, like I could get down, like that the lesbian one. No, this was a regular regular wait, what do you mean?
Speaker 1:regular, what's regular?
Speaker 3:man and woman oh, you know listeners, let's, let's be clear so that's yo.
Speaker 1:That is funny as hell. So what are your key things when you, when you are your tag words, what are they called? Tag words keywords. I just go to the categories of Pornhub don't you watch Asian ones too?
Speaker 4:what do you search for?
Speaker 1:I don't search, I just click on Pornhub and then I'll click on either gay porn or straight porn depending on what my mood is.
Speaker 5:I just go to.
Speaker 1:Pornhub and I click on either gay porn or straight porn, depending on what my mood is. I just go to Pornhub and I click on either gay porn or straight porn, depending on Wait but do you have a category? Well, in straight porn not really.
Speaker 3:Isn't that the rabbit hole you guys were talking about? Wait, no, is that what it's called the rabbit hole? Straight porn?
Speaker 1:I don't really have a category.
Speaker 3:I'll just watch it. What's the other one? The glory hole?
Speaker 1:We got to throw out some definitions. The rabbit hole is where you click on one video and then you watch something and then you click on another video. You just keep getting deeper and deeper until the bottom is pit. Now a glory hole is you guys, you listeners. You got to go Google glory hole. So glory hole is usually a wall or a curtain, just a divider Some kind of divider Put a hole in it.
Speaker 1:I've seen the ones with the female. Whatever hole they got, they stick it to the hole and someone sticks something through the hole. So what the guy is?
Speaker 5:The guy stick his penis through the hole and you have a girl on it. What the guy is.
Speaker 1:I think Glenn could probably talk about this the guy stick A lot of the glory hole. The guy stick his penis through the hole and you have a girl on the. There's a guy on the other side and he do whatever to it. So that's a glory hole. So sometimes you go here. It's talking about glory holes and rabbit hole. So rabbit hole is where you just keep clicking and clicking and clicking and video after video. You know the video, you know how you click on a video. Wait, let me ask you what's the weirdest rabbit hole like you've ended up in at the end? The weirdest one. I ended up where it was, um, a girl no, a girl shitting on a guy's um chest, yeah, that's you know.
Speaker 1:You keep clicking and clicking, not sexy so I'm gonna tell you, I'm gonna tell you what my, my, my, my keywords, that I, I, when I go into the um, if I go into the porn, I look for wet. I just put wet or wet. You know, wet, pussy, wet, whatever, something wet I'm going to look at you totally different now. Well, I mean, everybody has their keywords right. I don't see what's the problem. And I like amateur. It has to be amateur. I don't like to act it and the whole, the whole setup, whatever.
Speaker 4:So what about you? What? What are your keywords?
Speaker 1:just well, cat. There's no keywords for pornhub, so I'll click on category. So straight porn, I'll just watch whatever okay but gay porn. I will narrow it down. It'll either be um interracial, um straight, because there's some where there's straight straight gay straight straight straight like either they've been tricked or they've are um wait wait, get back up or or they're just curious or they're paid, like the ones that are paid. Oh, I love those ones. Wait, so what happens?
Speaker 3:so they pretend like they, like they think they're paid, like the ones that are paid oh, I love those. Wait. So what happens? So they pretend like they like they think they're straight and then they go in and it's gay stuff there's one called bait bus.
Speaker 1:I don't know how real it is. I don't know if that's kind of almost. Sometimes I feel like it's staged and sometimes I feel like it's real, I don't know. But there's another one that's called um. If I on the straight category, there's a whole guy that pays dudes to let him give them head. Sometimes they get it in too. I don't know how much they get paid.
Speaker 2:Wait, but these are straight guys.
Speaker 4:These are straight guys.
Speaker 2:No, they can't be straight, but the same straight guys who are like a mouth is a mouth honey, what?
Speaker 4:No? A mouth is a rat hole.
Speaker 1:No, no no, but this guy pays some serious money, and if you're desperate for money, it's like a dick, yeah, no. The straight guys are not doing anything. They're sitting back and letting him.
Speaker 3:They're letting someone else suck your dick, doing anything they're sitting back and letting him right.
Speaker 1:They can, because most of them are just watching porn.
Speaker 4:Wow have you ever done that uh, that'd be a negative I would really love to have a discussion on, honestly, how common this is. I feel like a lot of, and I know you guys are not going to want to have this conversation or want to agree with me but let's talk here.
Speaker 5:You're open to listen.
Speaker 4:I feel like there are a lot of straight men who who are, like I'm not gay, but are open to receiving head from a gay man.
Speaker 3:Remember when we talked about with the tank, or that's not.
Speaker 1:No so so I hear that a lot.
Speaker 2:So to me and I might be crazy, but I don't even really believe in bisexuality I think that you're either straight or gay. Right Now I do think people can do both if they go through the motions, but I think, in terms of an internal feeling, you're either straight or gay, and if you're a straight guy, you don't really want to have anything to do with a gay guy that way.
Speaker 1:I don't know no.
Speaker 3:I don't think so I'm curious.
Speaker 2:I'm curious but.
Speaker 1:I know gay dudes that will fuck a girl.
Speaker 2:Right, well, I'm saying Without a problem.
Speaker 3:You know, I guess he's what he's saying. Are they really gay, though? Right?
Speaker 1:Oh, I know two people and I was like Please don't say no names. I was like girl.
Speaker 4:I was like Girl.
Speaker 1:I was like why are?
Speaker 4:you letting that little girl?
Speaker 1:hit it and she's like oh, it just happened and you know it's been a regular. I'm like girl, I'm like I don't see it, but it happens.
Speaker 4:I mean, I do, I think it happens and I think I do I think.
Speaker 2:What's your theory on it? What were you saying? You were saying that, what, that some straight guys are really what?
Speaker 4:I think that they I'm not gonna say regularly, but I think it's, some are just open I think it's a more common thing, that thing that we would, then we would like to believe that there are many straight men who would be open to experimenting or doing things with other men, even though they don't want to admit it.
Speaker 1:Admit it because you know what I disagree. It's not because to me you can't, I don't, I don't want to admit it. Admit it because, okay, you know what I disagree. It's not because to me you can't, I don't, I don't, you can't, say I'm not gay, but I would do it. That don't make sense to me not everybody is willing, though that's what I'm saying. Some people are more open, others I. I've had friends that were more open than others.
Speaker 4:Right, you know what I'm saying, but I also feel like if you go on the flip side and there are women who will, when they're in a relationship they might have a threesome, they might mess around with another woman or they might be interested or curious. Men won't look at that sideways and say, oh, she's lesbian.
Speaker 1:Oh, it is a double standard.
Speaker 4:Don't get me wrong, it is a double standard.
Speaker 1:That's not getting fucked up. It is a double standard. But what I'm saying is you know it's totally different, we know it's totally Once a guy has another guy, I don't believe that.
Speaker 4:I don't believe that either.
Speaker 1:I've hooked up with a co-worker of mine back in the day and he's never been with a dude, nothing like that, and he has no desire to be with a dude. But he says I'm cool, he likes me, he knows I'm not crazy and not extra gay and shit like that. He was cool with it. But I mean we didn't go all the way. I mean it was just a little. Flyboy.
Speaker 4:I'm going to tell you that does not make no sense to me.
Speaker 3:Tell us what you did. How far did you go? That's how we're able to see you. Oh, I only gave him head.
Speaker 1:I'm just going to speak for me. I can't speak for every guy in the universe. If you have any thoughts about it? No, let's pause right there. It took me maybe a good two years. Oh, so you slow walked him. No, no, no no. You were in that gay straight category.
Speaker 3:Why not? No not really. We can't count you because you'd be slow rolling. You slow walked him.
Speaker 1:No, but no, how to catch a predator? I wasn't, I wasn't thinking about this, we weren't talking about it, it just happened. But he knew I was gay. But he would say certain things and I'm like okay, so what's good, he was curious.
Speaker 4:He was curious.
Speaker 3:Exactly, he was curious but it it took about two or three years before because something, even okay, so you let him before he let you do something, or before like, like, how? Like? Was he the one that was like no, no, no, I don't want to do that like. Did you have to? Like coax him?
Speaker 1:no, this, this. You want to hear the story.
Speaker 3:Yes, we want details. Let's hear it.
Speaker 1:Let's hear the short version.
Speaker 5:Please don't say his name. He was hurt. I don't remember his name.
Speaker 1:I don't remember his name. He was hurt because his girlfriend's friend said something about his penis.
Speaker 3:Okay, His dick.
Speaker 1:And I think he, the boy, his girlfriend's friend, was gay or something like that. I guess she showed him or said something about it, oh my gosh. And the boy repeated it. I guess they had a fight. And then the boy said something and he was all butthurt and he was like oh, you know, I'm having trouble, I keep thinking about it. I said boy, it ain't that serious. I'm like ain't nothing wrong with you. He's like, oh, I can't get it up cause I keep talking, I keep thinking about what he said and it's like it's fucking up our relationship. I said fool. I said ain't nothing wrong with you and of course, I said something. I said, well, I bet ain't nothing wrong with you, so that's pretty much.
Speaker 4:It show me that sound like game show me what you working with, let me check it out.
Speaker 5:He kicked game too two years before but you was working on it, but you were able to get it up right oh, of course but I told him.
Speaker 3:I said ain't nothing wrong with you.
Speaker 1:I said ain't nothing wrong with you, but then he was like said ain't nothing wrong with you. I said ain't nothing wrong with you, but then he was like oh, you ain't going to finish. I said no, that wasn't the whole point of this.
Speaker 5:I said I just wanted to see that was game. That's no different than a woman coasting a man that's been hurt hey.
Speaker 1:And working on it and working on it until she get what she want, rubbing his back a little bit. You know that they call that slow walk.
Speaker 3:That's called slow walking. That's slow walking, Whoever you are out there.
Speaker 5:I'm so sorry that you did that dirty Flyboy is not okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you did turn him out. I didn't do anything, I just wanted to see if it wasn't even that long. That's why he was like you gonna come over later.
Speaker 2:I was like no, it wasn't that long.
Speaker 4:The event His ego. He did not have a big ego.
Speaker 1:I just wanted to see if it was gonna work. It worked, and I'm like okay, You're such an asshole. You know I mean, I don't know, I disagree with the whole thing. If you to me as a guy, if you, if you to me as a guy, if you think about it, fantasize about it or just consider it, then I mean you're gay you're gay, like it's okay, but I'm just saying white or black is binary, it's so.
Speaker 2:Do you guys feel that way?
Speaker 5:about women, because no, I don't.
Speaker 1:I don't feel like it's a double standard, so how could?
Speaker 5:the women double standard but that's not fair.
Speaker 1:Okay, so let me get something. Okay. So if you go out and have relations with a female that's being married and then you come home and tell your husband, everything's going to be okay, right? So your husband goes out and have sexual relations with a man, you're going to look at him different, you're going to be okay with that. First of all, I think, with that first of all, I think my husband would probably look at me differently if I came home either way, man or woman, not me, fuck that.
Speaker 5:Let my wife come home. I'm like ow, but take the trust out okay, take the trust out. Being a man that he is, he probably would say hey, you. So what did y'all do? Let me see, can I watch? Can I do that? So would you do the same? Take the trust out. Okay, take the trust out. Being a man that he is, he probably would say hey. So what did y'all do? Let me see, can I watch.
Speaker 1:Can I da-da-da? So would you do the same thing Like oh, let me see what the guy did to you See, I probably would, I would not do that You're disgusting.
Speaker 5:You lying.
Speaker 2:You lying have asked me to watch why I get with their boyfriend.
Speaker 3:I want to see no, no, no, we're not talking about flirting with your boyfriend.
Speaker 5:We're talking about them two doing that actual act and him enjoying it with another man. He's getting pounded. First of all, you guys have seen my husband. He's not getting pounded in no type of way.
Speaker 1:What if he did? What if he's like? That's what I want, though?
Speaker 5:Then I would have to let him go.
Speaker 1:Okay, see, it's a double standard.
Speaker 3:You making our point? No, she said let him go and explore. She didn't say let him go.
Speaker 1:No, she said let him go. No, no, no, let him go and explore. Do you accept him back?
Speaker 5:it depends. I will have to see. See, that's what I'm saying, that's what I'm saying it's okay I don't, I would not be okay with that thank
Speaker 2:you I just don't like the double standards of women.
Speaker 5:It's okay for women to caress and talk to each other and have sex with each other, but it's not okay for men to do the same.
Speaker 4:Okay, so let me ask y'all a question ladies a question, not the men you find out that your husband or you Okay. So let me ask y'all a question. I'm just saying Ladies a question, not the men. You find out that your husband or you guys are married. So your husband, you know that in the anus of a man is a prostate gland.
Speaker 5:It feels good for them, or whatever, so they enjoy that.
Speaker 4:They enjoy anal penetration. They enjoy. How do you feel about that?
Speaker 1:I mean if that's a thing, if that's a thing, I mean if that's a thing, if that's a thing does that make you feel like they're into that kind of like that makes them gay or something like that?
Speaker 2:okay no, because, remember, it's about who who's providing that right right, it's a difference if he's like.
Speaker 5:I don't think it's a difference. Is it because if it's anal play, if it's anal play?
Speaker 2:it's anal play. If he's like, can you put on a football helmet and do this? Not at all, but what if he wanted you?
Speaker 4:to put a dildo in his ass while you guys were having sex.
Speaker 2:I probably would have a problem. How would you feel about that?
Speaker 4:I probably would have a problem, because that's like a dick, I probably would have a problem.
Speaker 3:But it was something, Because that would be in the place of a penis and I don't have one of those Right. So at that point it's not about who's giving it to you, he's fantasizing about somebody else giving it to him?
Speaker 4:Well, you're giving it to him. Well, I don't have a penis.
Speaker 5:No, you don't, but you have a fake one. But even digital penetration. If your husband wanted digital penetration in his anus, I'm sorry. I would probably look at him sideways and be like you, like that?
Speaker 1:shit. Well, is it a problem? I think I question. Is it a problem though?
Speaker 5:Because then I would start questioning his sexuality. No, as far as what's next?
Speaker 2:Remember, it's two things for us. One is the actual physical act and pleasure, and one is who it's being given and ministered to and by.
Speaker 5:Both of those need to work in harmony for a heterosexual guy to really but I think that once you start diving and playing with the actual pleasure, that's what it's about, and Ant can tell me that's what it's about as far as the gay sex, not necessarily Because it's all about pleasure.
Speaker 1:But what if you get turned on from a woman?
Speaker 4:Like, oh, I'm saying, oh, I get turned on because a woman's sticking a finger in my butt, right, but if that same woman is using other objects and it no longer becomes I think.
Speaker 1:I think what mac is saying is if you, if you still visualize and it's a female doing it, if you're okay, maybe if a guy do it it would turn you off, like I don't like that absolutely right, that's what he's saying. I I mean, that's not my thing, but that's what he might be.
Speaker 3:That's what I was saying, because I was saying like, even though it's like something you're doing with the anus, you were saying Right, but if it's you doing it, it's, it's something different versus like, if it's a like a dildo, like that, that's like a prop for somebody else, right, like I me personally, I don't have a dick, so I can't stick that in you, but if you're asking me to put an object there. You're thinking about somebody else, Because I don't have that.
Speaker 4:I mean, what if it's as simple as you have nails and he doesn't like your nails going up there, so he wants you to use an object because it's more comfortable for him.
Speaker 1:You understand what I mean. What if the guy says it just feels good, I don't care what you use, it just feels good I'm still gonna, I'm probably still gonna question, but so and so back to my point.
Speaker 2:It's the person right and it's not even what it's all everybody has all these fetishes, all kinds of different fetishes straight, you know, straight people and gay people but to me it's about who's administering it, right, because think about it, let's say it's some 92-year-old woman, right? Most straight men wouldn't get turned on by that. Just knowing that something like that is doing whatever it is that they supposedly like, they wouldn't really enjoy that.
Speaker 4:It's kind of kinky. Somebody might enjoy a 92-year-old.
Speaker 2:Right, somebody might, but most won't.
Speaker 5:But the key word you said is fetish. So basically, and that's what porn is it's about the different types of fetishes that you're into and it the satisfaction that you get from it, because, honestly, watching porn, it doesn't do anything for me really. Yeah, I like body-to-body contact. I like. I like, I want to feel the after. I want you to thrust me, I want, I want to feel that I'll watch it with you if that's what you're into to get you turned on. But I'm not into that.
Speaker 1:I don't want to watch with nobody. If you're there next to me, we fucking. You said forget this damn video, because someone was like oh, we can watch porn together, fuck that shit. If you're here, we fucking, we can make our own, but we ain't going to watch one together. Plain and simple. I said the whole purpose of it is because you ain't here. Oh, okay, so you use it as a filler, that's it. I use it for many different reasons. Sometimes it's just to get you in the mood.
Speaker 1:I can get in the mood. I don't need none. You're not 40 yet. I need a little extra. I mean I'm almost there. Three, three more years I'll be there, shit. Yeah, I mean you know. So I mean porn to me it's just sometimes, I don't know, sometimes I like to just turn it on, just look at it for like five minutes and I turn right back off and I'll be on some, some other stuff.
Speaker 5:I don't know, I it's, but so erotic books, do that for me I love erotic books do that for me, so, whereas porn don't erotic books. Erotic books do that for me, so, whereas porn don't do it for me.
Speaker 4:the erotic books, because you can use your own imagination and start picturing the words and I could read the words and I could picture what is going on?
Speaker 5:And I get so excited Of a book, yes, of words. I'm done.
Speaker 1:I think that's a female thing because I know a lot of girls tell me that, yes, I can't.
Speaker 4:I have to agree with that. I'm visual.
Speaker 5:I'm straight visual.
Speaker 1:I don't want to read and imagine, I want to see. Yeah, I'm a visual person, I got to see.
Speaker 4:That's the difference between women and men. I think that men need that visual and I think women like sensuality. So we want to be able to use our imagination and when we read erotic books we can kind of imagine how we would want that situation. Like you're reading it, but you can kind of picture it and make that work.
Speaker 5:For you because I do that all this. Yeah, I read it. I'll call my husband like hey, I just read this can you do this?
Speaker 3:what is happening?
Speaker 2:right now can you use these descriptors?
Speaker 5:no, I just read this. No, I'm gonna be waiting for you when you get home off a book.
Speaker 1:I can't do it off a book, though but that's the difference between men and women.
Speaker 5:I can't do it off a book.
Speaker 1:Neither, that's what I was saying. I think it's more of a female thing. I hear more females say they can read erotic books, you know, and get those juices flowing pretty rapidly.
Speaker 2:Wait, is that actually a thing Like erotic?
Speaker 1:books. Yes, I didn't know that You're not talking about romantic books.
Speaker 5:No, no, no, you're talking about erotic books.
Speaker 1:So explain erotic, give me an idea. Yeah, because I'm curious. Now I'm about to read something.
Speaker 5:So romantic. You have the romance, you know the typical love and the typical storyline. Pretty much TV stuff right Like soap operas.
Speaker 1:Erotic books are hardcore blow-by-bl by blow action of sex.
Speaker 5:So 50 shades of grey, the book version, you know what I'm saying Zayn is like one of the best.
Speaker 4:I'm curious, I'm like I'm intrigued she's known for writing erotic novels, or sometimes she'll have like erotic short stories, so there'll be women.
Speaker 5:I've read so many of her books but there was like a um so one of her famous books is the sex chronicles, yes, and then she has part one, part two and then eventually there was actually a showtime series about her story yeah. And it would be like short stories, but it would be sexual experiences that women and men experience, or whoever there was a sorority.
Speaker 4:What was it? Um something, something.
Speaker 2:Five, fuck them isn't this just like 50 shades of gray? No, actually it's a little different.
Speaker 5:It's a little different. So I've read 50 shades of gray and, yes, the whole sn sn stuff. It depends on if you're into that. So it appeals to you if you're into the kinky stuff. But Zayn has hardcore stuff where it's like, oh wow, I want to feel that I don't understand.
Speaker 1:So give me a line. You don't got to be word for word. Tell me something that's in the book that you'd be like oh wow, think of something Because I'm curious.
Speaker 4:And this is the series. Like I remember reading a book by Anne Rice I don't Anne Rice, old school Anne Rice and this shit was crazy.
Speaker 5:I'm talking about like Give me an example, give me an example Sex slavery, like you know, like all kinds of shit, but you know it's funny, because my all time favorite book and I can't remember now was like a harlequin harlequin book and it was about a native american okay, my husband's native american, so you know that was my fantasy and um, a native american and he was on a horse and he's riding and he was a cowboy and then the lady came and she was looking at his muscles and everything was, you know, arched and the book describes how the muscles were bulging out of his chest and she was heaving because she was getting excited about it and eventually she follows him to the barn.
Speaker 1:Oh, Pornhub Pornhub.
Speaker 4:Pornhub. You just reading Pornhub.
Speaker 3:I wish everyone could see faces, Like if you saw G-Max's face this whole time.
Speaker 4:I'm like, what the Wait, I had it in time.
Speaker 1:Well, that's fine, did you see Perfect?
Speaker 3:Scenarios' face this entire time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, this is amazing, it ain't doing it for me. I'm the visual person. Again, it's.
Speaker 3:I want to on somebody's chest.
Speaker 1:Exactly what the fuck I ended up there. I'm a visual guy, I'm a type of guy.
Speaker 5:That's why R Kelly peeing and shit what the hell Wait, you like that?
Speaker 1:No, not the peeing.
Speaker 4:And shit, you like that kind of thing girl. I'll consider it, though. I will consider it.
Speaker 1:Peeing on someone.
Speaker 5:Someone asked me to do that to them.
Speaker 1:No, I'm not into that shit, but he was fine so you considered him peeing on you.
Speaker 3:No, he didn't pee on the guy he asked me. I was like no, you're crazy.
Speaker 1:We were just talking online. I was like I'm not into that shit, and then you want me to get it in with you after. Has anybody been peed on before Hell?
Speaker 4:no, no, but I have been asked to pee on someone.
Speaker 1:Did you pee? Did you do it? I couldn't, I couldn't perform.
Speaker 4:It just couldn't happen. I was too shy.
Speaker 3:You should have been drunk. You could have been able to do it Probably if I was drunk, but I wasn't drunk. You should have drank a couple beers.
Speaker 4:I was like no, I can't do this and they were like all right. Well, what about it? You know, can we go in the shower? And I'm like no, no, it's not, it wouldn't come out, so they were really fascinated by it.
Speaker 5:They really wanted me to pee on them.
Speaker 3:Did you say were you like? No, no.
Speaker 4:I was just like it's not coming out, it's not happening, please don't. I had Get down.
Speaker 5:I hope he doesn't listen.
Speaker 4:He knows exactly who he is too. That's okay. He's going to raise his hands and say it's me.
Speaker 1:He's really going to raise it with me. Why is your back so quiet?
Speaker 4:I was like it's not coming out.
Speaker 1:It's not working. Her back is disturbed. Her back is disturbed For her like disturbed.
Speaker 5:His back is disturbed because he's like what the For her it was probably a mental thing because, honestly, like what, like you probably think about it and be like Sometimes you have to.
Speaker 3:You be like okay.
Speaker 5:Right, you gotta be into it for it to flow and if you ain't used to that.
Speaker 4:So it's like to someone that doesn't do it they will be like what I'm not doing.
Speaker 5:That.
Speaker 1:But if you're used to it you're like, oh yeah, but I heard from women that that's the best orgasm.
Speaker 4:I'm not going to comment.
Speaker 1:Okay, so it is so it is so fuck it. I'll say it yes, on a very, very drunken night, but why you guys don't have a prostate, so I don't understand like why it would be it's a different intensity. Oh okay, it's a different intensity. I understand oh, okay uh oh.
Speaker 3:I think G-Mac's getting uncomfortable.
Speaker 1:We're talking about something else. G-mac is like yo listen. I'm so done with I don't get off from it, though I'm taking notes.
Speaker 3:Grande Mac, he's like erotica Drunken nights If you guys ever want to read erotic novels.
Speaker 4:I have it in my phone. You want me to read like a?
Speaker 1:Alright, give me a minute, but this is.
Speaker 4:Anne Rice. So there's the Claiming of Sleeping Beauty, there's Beauty's Punishment and Beauty's Relapse. It's a series.
Speaker 1:I want to hear the relapse.
Speaker 4:Okay, you want to hear relapse, yeah.
Speaker 1:I want to hear relapse. Yeah, we're here. I want to hear this while you're doing that, I'll keep talking, I'll pull up. Oh shit, I don't know because I'm going to see what and wait before you do it.
Speaker 3:I want to say it in a sensual voice you have to do it in a voice, I can, so do that.
Speaker 1:Do that, because I want, I want the list as a fill, because, you never know, I might, tomorrow, I might start reading this stuff. If you, if you could get me at least intrigued, I I would consider reading it.
Speaker 3:You gotta stick with your to-do list. Erotica is not on there.
Speaker 1:It's just crazy. I feel like I just need to turn on Pornhub and get it over with Basically.
Speaker 4:Keep talking. I wonder if you can type in erotica in Pornhub.
Speaker 3:if it comes up, I'm already gonna try amateur lesbians.
Speaker 2:You guys are funny.
Speaker 1:You guys are really pulling up these things on your phone.
Speaker 2:They going for it. Oh my God, you guys are excited.
Speaker 3:Oh my God, I can never say that.
Speaker 1:a book is not excited. Reading a book is not really porn.
Speaker 3:But that is a form of porn.
Speaker 1:Why wouldn't that be.
Speaker 5:It gets you excited. It's the same pleasure that you get media. It gets you excited from reading. The same.
Speaker 1:The same pleasure that you get from watching porn, I get from reading a book so I'm just trying to picture a woman and sitting in a bed with a book open not sitting baby lying down lying down, lying down reading a book holding a book picturing yourself.
Speaker 5:You know what it is. You were max, you're right.
Speaker 1:We we have visual, so that I think that's that we can't get past like I can't get past words like you know I'm looking at the words, so you're saying you're a dummy when it comes to getting turned on. I can't just be sitting and reading, unless someone's texting you or sending you a message. But reading a book didn't get turned on and no, I don't. I don't see it.
Speaker 3:Maybe it has to be personal, like if somebody like send you a message that's personal, right like, or a picture that's personal, or like something that will turn you on versus somebody who's impersonal, like the book that I so, but she described why can't you relate it to a person the same way how you're? Because you know that that person who sent you the message right Like you're like okay, that's something that I can envision, because it might happen.
Speaker 2:See, that's the key word. If you have to use your imagination to make it work, then that doesn't work as much.
Speaker 5:But you're using your imagination when you're watching porn, I mean for me when you're watching porn.
Speaker 2:I mean, I mean, I mean for me.
Speaker 5:I'm not looking at those, like I'm not looking at the couple having sex or the two lesbians having sex picturing myself having sex with them. You're using your imagination on the person that you want to have sex with.
Speaker 3:If I send, my husband a naked picture right, okay. He's going to hopefully get excited because he can envision himself with me.
Speaker 1:But you already sent him a visual picture, Right?
Speaker 3:but that's what I'm saying. You were talking about people sending you images or like text messages. You can envision, because it's personal. You can envision yourself doing something.
Speaker 2:But I can't see myself reading something that says oh, and he grabs her by the hair.
Speaker 3:I'm not advocating for that. I'm advocating for what you guys are saying.
Speaker 1:Okay, because I'm about to say saying okay, because I'm gonna say because text your husband right now, but like listen babe I'm naked you did.
Speaker 3:He'll be like no, he's gonna be like where the fuck are you? Well, I'm just saying I thought you were doing a pod. No, let's just say you're home.
Speaker 1:Let's say you're home, he's at work and you and you were like baby I'm naked he's not gonna be like oh, really, would you let me, let me tell me more he's gonna be like send me the picture, yeah right, you see.
Speaker 3:You see what I'm saying? No, I get what you're saying and I'm right on board. That's what I'm saying. Like if you have someone who sends you something you know there could be potential in order to make something happen with them, so that's, you're more intrigued right by that image, versus like a book where it's not personal, like I, right, I?
Speaker 1:don't? I mean I guess you got to have Honestly in order to read a book and get turned on. I think you have to have a very vivid imagination.
Speaker 2:Your imagination got to be on, really on To me, either that or be a female. Me too, right, are you ready, are you?
Speaker 4:ready, let me read to you. Close your eyes.
Speaker 1:Okay. I'm going to close your eyes Ness is about to read us an excerpt to some erotica.
Speaker 3:It's the relapse.
Speaker 1:The relapse. This is not the relapse. Oh, what is it?
Speaker 4:It was.
Speaker 5:Yeah, because some of these stuff is not coming out. I'll tell you what it is after.
Speaker 1:Hold on. Okay, let's close your eyes I'm truly going to close my eyes.
Speaker 4:Close your eyes, okay, but the immediately in his chamber, and now she was with him. Leon had removed a small ceiling wax from her secret core of pleasure and she felt the first steer stirring of desire. She did not care about the servants moving about or the last minister waiting nearby with his petition. She kissed the princess boots again. It's very late. The prince said you had a long rest and I see you're much improved for it. Beauty waited, look at me, he said, and when she did, she was shocked by the beauty and ferocity of his black eyes. She felt her breath catch, her catch in her throat. Come, he said, rising and dismissing the minister. It's time for lessons.
Speaker 4:He walked fast toward his bed chamber and she followed on her hands and knees, rushing before him as he waited for her to open the door, going in behind him. If she could only sleep here, live here, she thought. Blah, blah, blah, skipping a little bit. He says kneel up, he said. She obeyed hands behind her neck and then she saw her little brass bells he held and that each was fixed into a little spring clamp. Before she could protest, he applied one very carefully to the nipple of her right breast. It was not tight enough to hurt. Nevertheless, it bit down on her nipple, pinching her and causing the nipple to harden. Nipple pinching her and causing the nipple to harden. She watched as he clamped the other to her left breast and then, without meaning to, she took a deep breath that made the bells ring ever so faintly.
Speaker 1:That didn't do shit for me.
Speaker 2:Not a goddamn thing All.
Speaker 1:I was thinking about was what is he doing?
Speaker 2:I was thinking like damn, that shit had to hurt. I was like, what is he doing? That's Harlequin romance.
Speaker 3:I was thinking like damn, that shit had to hurt. I was like what is he doing?
Speaker 1:What the fuck is he doing?
Speaker 4:What the fuck is you doing? It's a lot right, but as we go on, I appreciate you like your voice changing and all that it made it a little better.
Speaker 1:It did I think the voice did it. It did not.
Speaker 4:I'm not going to have your voice reading the book. Well, I can read books for you guys.
Speaker 1:I can do audio books if you want to pay me. I don't see it. I just don't see it.
Speaker 3:You see the true difference.
Speaker 1:You see the true difference in women and guys.
Speaker 4:We're very visual.
Speaker 1:That's why you women get offended every time. I'm like send me a picture, send me what you got on right now. Oh, take that off. Send me a picture, because guys are very visual. You girls want to be like you didn't ask me how my day was. You didn't say I love you. Fuck all that shit Damn. It's true, I'm going gonna stick to my Pornhub, my uh, what's the other one? Xx videos. I'm gonna stick to all that. I'm good, but I appreciate. I appreciate y'all reading the book.
Speaker 4:I haven't read a book in so long, but they are fun to read yeah, books are fun.
Speaker 1:I don't know about getting turned on from reading something I have.
Speaker 4:I have handled a scandal or two to reading an erotic novel. Really, yeah, I won't tell a lie.
Speaker 1:Yeah, just turn on a porn and I'll be good. I'm okay, thank you.
Speaker 4:All facts.
Speaker 1:So anybody else want to add anything to this, to your porn glory holes. You guys want to look up gloria, would you try glory hole?
Speaker 4:absolutely not why not?
Speaker 1:because you don't know what's coming in that hole no, let's just say you, you buy you you in a room with safe people. You want to try glory hole?
Speaker 3:safe people, safe people, a safe person I'll be safe person.
Speaker 1:I just say a safe no.
Speaker 4:So if your husband come home and ask you to make a glory hole, I mean if it was part of a fantasy, yeah, if it's like your husband and he's like, yeah, let's make a hole and I'll stick your dick in this board Okay.
Speaker 3:Then I'd be like who's fixing that wall? You realize it's all about the anonymity right.
Speaker 2:That's why it's.
Speaker 1:He can just hang a curtain over the doorway. Then I'll be like who's fixing that?
Speaker 3:wall. We have to call the contractor, and then he has to fix the wall.
Speaker 1:Do you guys have any sexual fantasies that you want to talk about, or?
Speaker 3:no.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:Oh, you guys suck.
Speaker 1:What about you?
Speaker 3:I do, Can you talk about yours? No, I'm not going to talk about yours. Maybe if you talk about yours, then I'll talk about mine.
Speaker 1:I don't have any. You don't have nothing.
Speaker 4:I don't have a specific fantasy, not me?
Speaker 1:No, don't think I feel like whatever I wanted to do, I've done. Yeah, whatever happens, I can appreciate, do tell, do tell.
Speaker 4:I'd rather not.
Speaker 3:Except for peeing on someone. Right, I'm all the crazy shit.
Speaker 1:That's not a fantasy Killing on someone is not a fantasy at all.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I don't have any wild fantasies. I'm all about now, at this stage, I prefer some good sensuality, some good chemistry, some like you know just.
Speaker 1:Chemistry is everything she wants.
Speaker 4:Chemistry is everything I just want some R&B love, that's it.
Speaker 3:She wants old music. No, you want 90s.
Speaker 4:R&B. I want 90s R&B. Love.
Speaker 1:That's it, I'm going to ask you guys a question. If you had to have sex first of all, would you like music or no music?
Speaker 4:I like music. I like music and candles.
Speaker 2:What about you, beck, you?
Speaker 4:quiet.
Speaker 5:I do. I can do without the candles, but I like music.
Speaker 3:We've seen his bachelor pad. It's full of music, okay so so we got.
Speaker 1:So the majority of us that want music. Okay, so what type of music? R&b. Oh, you know what. I want to give you a category. What type of music do you like? Ness?
Speaker 4:I like R&B.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 4:But I, I mean hey spark, spark.
Speaker 1:What about you? I like a mixture of things, because it all depends on what you don't say mixture, because you, you mess around and put on like something like, uh, what is that?
Speaker 5:something I don't know well, you know, I want to hear some r&b and then, of course, I want to hear some reggae and soca. There's nothing. The only thing you could do with soca is fuck on soca but is that a relationship thing?
Speaker 1:because I'm not, with all that extra shit, I'm not you said no music at all.
Speaker 3:Well, you don't love anyone. I don't even gotta love someone to put on music.
Speaker 1:Let's get it in is the music thing like a relationship thing, cause I'm like I don't want no parts. I don't need all that extra, but you know what.
Speaker 5:It depends on the mood, cause sometimes I just be like fuck it, take my unzip, my dress and take it yes, I don't know, reading those fucking books again those fucking books.
Speaker 1:That's what it is. I wanted to be that way all the time. I'm an R&B guy. I like R&B club. Like when I want to show off, I put on some club you want to show off.
Speaker 3:I put on some club. You want to be extra you?
Speaker 1:want to be extra, got to be club.
Speaker 3:I like a little love song in there. No, no, no.
Speaker 2:See, I like to hear her response, so I don't want nothing blocking it.
Speaker 3:You can hear that.
Speaker 4:You don't turn the music down when I'm not blocking it. Yeah, I like music on, but I like to sing along, so back you said you like to.
Speaker 1:You want to hear her sing. Yeah, you want to hear her sing.
Speaker 4:No, I'm singing along while we having sex.
Speaker 5:Well, I like that.
Speaker 4:No, it's not, I'm singing while you stroking. I'm feeling it.
Speaker 1:If you're singing while he, I would have to say shut the fuck up, because someone would. I hooked up with someone and fucked up my whole vibe. I'm like will you shut the fuck up?
Speaker 5:I'm like shit, I'm busy.
Speaker 1:They were singing on you Not singing, but they were just saying shit, just anything Like, just, oh, you know, just talking.
Speaker 4:And I'm like, I'm not with that shit.
Speaker 3:Remind us never to be intimate with you. You messed me all up. I was in the groove, I was almost there.
Speaker 1:And you destroyed it all. Now I got to start all over again.
Speaker 2:Just shut the fuck up. I agree with that. Shut the fuck up. It's a mental. Yeah, you guys don't understand. It is mental, there is some mental aspect to this, and so like in it.
Speaker 5:That's what you're saying. No, I like music.
Speaker 4:I don't know about them. I want music. Do you guys like talking noise?
Speaker 2:I don't want nothing, that's fine.
Speaker 1:Moaning fine, All that other good shit, but talking or just saying, oh yeah, this and that.
Speaker 5:So you don't want somebody to be like give it to me dad.
Speaker 1:No, just shut the fuck up.
Speaker 4:Okay. So I have a big problem with the daddy thing. You don't even want to know if it feels good.
Speaker 1:I can hear that in the way you moaning and you breathing.
Speaker 3:You don't want to know why do you look uncomfortable?
Speaker 4:It's about the distraction.
Speaker 1:It is. If you're in a groove, you don't want to be distracted. I disagree with them.
Speaker 5:Have you guys had sex with someone that wasn't on your sexual capacity? Because? Based on what you're saying you want somebody to shut the fuck up, take it and don't say nothing but a little moan once in a while.
Speaker 1:No, you can do all the moan and the heavy breathing, but don't fucking talk to me, don't ask me if it's okay and all this other shit. Shut the yeah, it's okay, obviously, if I'm still here. So put a muscle on that motherfucker. Just shut the fuck up and let me do what I do. Now he's real hardcore.
Speaker 3:Yeah, oh God, you guys, are he be fucking people? He don't want to make love.
Speaker 1:I guess I'm a wimp, I make love when I'm in a relationship or I really like somebody, but if it's a hookup, even still, if I'm dating somebody, still I don't.
Speaker 5:You want them to shut the fuck up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, don't talk to me, Don't talk.
Speaker 5:So do you tell them to shut the fuck up?
Speaker 1:Yes, no, I don't. Actually I don't, and see sometimes, but it does fuck me up though, because I'm like, oh, I wish this motherfucker would shut the fuck up already. I don't know. I like music.
Speaker 4:Why are you no, fuck, we're past music.
Speaker 1:We're past that point, okay. So what are we on?
Speaker 5:We're talking about Shut the fuck up.
Speaker 4:That's what we're talking about Talking, talking Noises Do you also get distracted?
Speaker 1:I don't get distracted.
Speaker 4:I feel like these men need quiet.
Speaker 1:I don't need quiet.
Speaker 4:I don't care what's going on.
Speaker 2:No but if it's good and I'm in the groove.
Speaker 1:I want to stay in the groove and my mind as soon as you break that up with something it's like. So I wonder if the listeners are.
Speaker 5:So is it that all men just want to be in that groove?
Speaker 1:No, I just said I don't, so what are you guys thinking? I said I don't, so what are?
Speaker 5:you guys thinking Is it that okay? Yeah, I'm gonna give it to her and I'm yeah you getting this shit right now.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah yeah, no, I don't even think about that.
Speaker 5:You don't wanna break your concentration because you don't wanna come quick. Maybe them two, I'm okay.
Speaker 1:I'm good. I'm good, I ain't worried about coming quick, but I'm good. Damn, I'm like shit. Now I got to start all over again.
Speaker 4:Look I mean that whole two minutes just went out the window. I was in the groove.
Speaker 3:I'll be honest with you when I was younger. That whole two minutes just went out the window. There ain't no fucking two minutes here and that's why they keep coming back.
Speaker 4:Okay, I'll be. When I was younger it was about concentration Period. Exclamation point bitch.
Speaker 1:When I was younger, it was about concentration. I don't think now I don't have to concentrate.
Speaker 5:Yeah, but you're married.
Speaker 1:See, I guess if I'm in a relationship it would probably be different, I guess, Right. To concentrate, no, no. Just how you are with the music and you know, just no. I was using music when I wasn't married.
Speaker 3:I music and you know just but, no, I was using music when I was. It wasn't married. I always use music it's like. It's like it calms you, it's like a pace set. It's like a pace set for me, it's like so you know what track nine to me, just like it.
Speaker 1:It puts. It puts me in the mood. I actually want music going. I will go longer. I would try to. It was. I mean, I'm not trying to toot my horn, but when I I was in college I used to try to outlast the CD. So I would go all the way through the CD and try to get it to the next CD.
Speaker 3:That was 20 years ago. I know, I probably, you know, I probably the first.
Speaker 1:The first, outro is the outro. I'd be out with the outro, but I mean you know I don't know you guys. See, I think't know, you guys.
Speaker 5:See, I think I've never came into my sexual peak until after my first marriage. I think that's when my sexual peak took off, and probably because I was in my thirties then. So it it. Just, I started knowing myself and knowing what I wanted and knowing what I want to get out of it, and then, yeah, I was on my whole shit. So I was. So, yeah, I would fuck somebody and don't give two craps about it right when they said women can't have that in that disconnect bullshit.
Speaker 5:I had that disconnect and didn't give two dams about it.
Speaker 1:I never had mad at that. You never had what Worst, you never had what.
Speaker 3:Like I can't do that.
Speaker 1:Do what?
Speaker 3:I can't like have sex with someone and not like Not care for them?
Speaker 5:Yeah, let me care.
Speaker 3:Okay so how I?
Speaker 5:wish I had that.
Speaker 3:Wait, what do you mean not?
Speaker 5:care.
Speaker 1:Because you're a sweetheart, so you so. So everybody who has sex with you care for them to a certain extent.
Speaker 3:Like I, you think about them maybe afterwards or you can you know it's some type of connection. If it it doesn't go past, like you know you, the dating phase like months later, then fine, but I don't know.
Speaker 5:Like I just you know, I see, you know, see, and I've been there.
Speaker 2:I think that's noble.
Speaker 5:I've been there where I've been the guy. You know, I've been the guy.
Speaker 1:So when you say the guy, what does that mean?
Speaker 5:So, case in point, I've had a sescapade, I would say, with someone and he was just like oh, so you're leaving. Oh, yeah, I'm leaving, so we're not going to cuddle Bitch, I ain't cuddling what the?
Speaker 1:fuck, I'm out, I hear that shit. I have. I've been in a situation where you are done and you'd be like, okay, you know, I probably could speak for all the guys. When you actually reach your orgasm, you start feeling like everything. Everything that you should have been thinking about comes to your mind. You're like damn, I shouldn't have been here.
Speaker 2:I should have took my ass, but why does motherfucker blink so hard?
Speaker 5:right like so.
Speaker 3:I've had that, I've had what you said like it's like you don't realize how annoying the person is. It's after you come like yeah, but I've person is until after you know it. Yeah, but.
Speaker 5:I've had that, and then I won't speak to them.
Speaker 1:Ever again.
Speaker 5:Ever again, like if that was my intention. I got it nice, was it? Thank you, ma'am.
Speaker 1:Wham bam. Thank you, ma'am.
Speaker 5:Yeah, and then boom, that's it.
Speaker 1:That's usually my intention.
Speaker 5:It't until like I met my husband that I was really like in love again, you know. But before that, please, spark was doing her thing. I wish peaches could do that do what?
Speaker 3:like a little before you know what I mean. Like you know, maybe I would have had more of an exciting, you know, 20s or 30s if I had that ability hell yeah, no, but it's to the point now where people are like hey, you remember me?
Speaker 1:no no wait, you don't remember your sex partners from back in my 20s? There's people still hitting me up online and be like they cause they remember that shit they be like hey, you remember me.
Speaker 3:I'm like no you should and be like they, because they remember that they're like hey, you remember me, I'm like no, you should just be like, send me a picture.
Speaker 1:No, their pictures are shown, but they're terrible.
Speaker 3:You're such a whore they're like oh you used to have a cat and blah, blah, blah I'm like okay, I'm like.
Speaker 5:Thank you for telling me about myself I know what the fuck I had, what I don't?
Speaker 1:remember you, so you should be telling me who the fuck you are. Don't tell me.
Speaker 3:I had a cat. That's kind of hella amazing, I think I can remember every single person. I know, I remember there's some gray areas.
Speaker 1:You got gray areas, tell us about them.
Speaker 5:Some gray areas. I can't tell.
Speaker 1:I can't tell you like that DM. So you were really like Warhol.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I can't tell you like that DMX song when he's naming all the girls. But there's a lot of people that will hit me up and they look totally different.
Speaker 2:You should make up a thing about Alicia. If I don't recognize them, to say they changed their whole image or something like that.
Speaker 1:That'll throw me off too. Like oh have like black hair or didn't you used to be skinny, or were you like more heavy? Said like I, that'll throw me off, so a lot of times I'll be like no, uh, I don't know wait, they used to ask you if you were fat like no, no, I'm just saying that's probably if they hit me up and they've changed your image or something like that it grew a beard or something that that'll throw me all also and I'll be like no, because one dude did hit me up and I'm like he's like you cooked me breakfast.
Speaker 1:I was like oh shit.
Speaker 3:I said oh, now I remember you Because I only did right.
Speaker 1:I'm like I only did that for one person in time and I'm like damn, you look way different. I'm like oh shit. Time has you know got to you I remember names. I didn't say that to him, but I was like, oh shit.
Speaker 3:I remember names and you stopped talking. You blocked him.
Speaker 1:I remember names where they're from everything. So you remember every sexual, yes, every sexual.
Speaker 5:So I remember, but some of them I kind of tend to block until things come up.
Speaker 1:A lot of the people I didn't know the names of, but I'm forgetful also, though.
Speaker 3:I'm very forgetful. You said you didn't know what. What did you say? You didn't know their names.
Speaker 5:Oh, so you really had one night stands? No, but I'm sure I never really had a real official one night stand.
Speaker 1:I'm sure, at that time they told me their names.
Speaker 3:But if it's what it is, why the fuck am I going to remember you and why would they hit me up and ask?
Speaker 5:me if I remember you. So, I've never had a one night stand to the point where I don't know your name and we just fuck. I've never had that.
Speaker 1:I had a one night stand, but after the one night stand I got to know the person but I don't know that.
Speaker 5:But then it's not a one night stand.
Speaker 1:I mean, I didn't have sex with him again after that, but I still see them around.
Speaker 5:Then it's not a one night stand because you got to know them.
Speaker 1:I thought one night stand is when you meet them that night and have sex with them, and then that's it.
Speaker 5:But you're not supposed to know anything about them.
Speaker 3:I think that counts, you're not supposed to know anything about them.
Speaker 2:You're not supposed to keep in touch One night stand. You don't keep in stand, right? Well, it wasn't a date, it was just like.
Speaker 1:I mean, I still talk to people I have one night stands. Well, they talk to me like on my Instagram.
Speaker 5:Well from.
Speaker 1:Nick. Depp it's not a one night stand Right. For me, it is because they'd be like when are we chilling again? What?
Speaker 3:That was 20 years ago, right Like that was a long time, that was it.
Speaker 2:A one night stand is when it's almost both people don't even hardly know each other.
Speaker 3:How do you know about all this? Get this thing in and they keep going.
Speaker 1:How do you know about a one night stand? How?
Speaker 2:many. I've never had a one night stand.
Speaker 1:So how do you know the definition? How do you know the?
Speaker 5:definition. I mean he does research, it's been defined.
Speaker 1:You can just Google that I've had a one night stand before.
Speaker 4:I've had a one night stand before. It was out of the country, oh god, oh, that's really a good thing.
Speaker 3:I bet you it was in the Dominican.
Speaker 4:Republic, wasn't it? No, it was in Jamaica, hey.
Speaker 1:Oh, was it. Was it named Dexter? You're dumb, no named.
Speaker 4:Donovan His last name ended in a Roy or something, something.
Speaker 5:Roy or some shit like that, of course, oh yeah.
Speaker 4:Something like that, but I remember, oh gosh, if I give you guys the details of this story, oh, just crazy.
Speaker 3:This might be an erotica that I might enjoy. Come on.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because I wasn't impressed with your last one.
Speaker 3:I need you to talk in that voice that you were talking when you were reading the book give you guys the details why?
Speaker 4:yeah, it's a safe place, a safe place to say yeah. This is like the first and only time I had a one-night stand and you're not talking in the voice.
Speaker 1:I can't remember the voice, right now do your parents listen to our podcast?
Speaker 4:I don't know, but I don't want them to. They do no, but still I don't want. I don't want to talk about my sex capades with my parents.
Speaker 5:You talked them sweet nuttons to you, huh. Well, okay, you said come here, girl, we're going to keep it rubbing PG-13 interview.
Speaker 4:PG-13. Well, I was at a club in Jamaica, in Negril. I've been to Jamaica four times, I think this was in Negril and I was with my girls and we were all partying. We were very inebriated and under the influence and having a great time. To think this was for like my 30th birthday, and so me and this guy ended up making out in the club and then we went outside the club and the club was like on the beach, it was a margaritaville. Y'all been to jamaica so you know margaritaville I've never been to jamaica.
Speaker 4:Okay, so I've been several times, you've never been to Jamaica. Jamaica's my second home. Yeah, I'm Jamaican so. So it was a Margaritaville and it was on the beach and we I remember it was so funny, so I'm making out with this guy and he said something something about wanting to know what it feels like and I was like ugh. He said come here, like so. I was like no, you're like no, so I'm like uh, I'm like like, don't talk to me so I'm like don't you do you have a condom and he said what up?
Speaker 4:and he said what up? No, he had one, he had one, and I remember. So we ended up doing it like on the side of the club and it was like on the beach and I remember a crab walking up my leg. It was a crab because we were on the beach.
Speaker 1:I remember like a, like a crustacean crab, or was it the std, a crustacean?
Speaker 4:I remember like, a, like a something, a critter was started walking up my leg and I was like, and I kicked it off, but then you know, it was just, it was just that was the one I said because you you never seen him or heard from him, or anything. No, well, you know, you come on now. You know how your boys from jamaica do, so they want to give you a phone number, and then they want a phone card and I was like no, that's not happening.
Speaker 4:Six brothers, so I know, okay, so you know how they do yeah.
Speaker 1:So what do you mean? Wait they, you said a phone call.
Speaker 4:Oh, they want to, they want to take your number and then they want you to send money to buy them a phone card so they could keep communicating, and I was like that's not going to happen so you got to buy them a phone card for the ACP so they could talk to me?
Speaker 1:No, thank you, that's how they do it. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know that was that.
Speaker 4:So is that a one night stand? Because she, it was a one night stand. We had no further communication.
Speaker 5:Yeah, that's a one night stand. That's a good one night stand.
Speaker 4:It was fun. It To me it was like storybook.
Speaker 5:She had sex on the beach.
Speaker 1:A-Spark do you ever have one on your stand?
Speaker 5:I told you, I never had one. Never had one.
Speaker 1:Never had one Listen.
Speaker 5:I'm very cautious about who you know. I love her.
Speaker 2:Good girl.
Speaker 1:You said you wish you did I wish I did.
Speaker 4:You wish you did. I thought I did. I wish I did. You wish you did. Well, I thought I did. That was the regrets definition, I guess I did that was officially, like I officially had a one day stand and that was that, but it was just the one.
Speaker 1:It was a this girl, I met her.
Speaker 5:I met her in Blockbuster oh my god, you taking it back.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's how far back it was. So I met her in Blockbuster. She worked at Blockbuster. She worked at Blockbuster.
Speaker 5:She gave me her number.
Speaker 1:She ended up calling me and I went to her house, we did it and that was it. I thought that was a one night stand.
Speaker 4:That was a one night stand we kept in touch.
Speaker 3:There's more to the story If you kept in touch with her then it wasn't a one night stand.
Speaker 1:It was a friendship after that I don't want to say kept in touch. So I she ended up knowing people that I know and I would see her here and there, but it was like you know, oh, so you never reached out to her.
Speaker 2:No, I never reached out to her. She never reached out to you.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, yes, one night stand crew.
Speaker 4:You're part of the club.
Speaker 1:So what else? Anything else.
Speaker 4:No, I feel like we've been talking for hours.
Speaker 3:No, we've only been talking for like an hour and 20 minutes. Well, anyway, are you sure?
Speaker 1:that it's recording. It's definitely recording. It's definitely recording. How good is it? I don't know.
Speaker 4:I want you to edit out my one night stand story.
Speaker 3:I don't know how to do that. I regret it now. I don't think that you remember when they were telling the story.
Speaker 1:That's not bad.
Speaker 5:Well, you didn't use names, you just said.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you didn't use no name. I made up the name Dexter.
Speaker 4:Who's name Isn't Dexter, a serial killer? No, I thought.
Speaker 1:Dexter was like Dexter.
Speaker 4:Longday, I never saw it what.
Speaker 1:I just got a text that the light is on in my car. It is.
Speaker 4:Why you didn't tell me that.
Speaker 2:I didn't know that was your car.
Speaker 1:Oh Well, anyway you.